Ever struggle with burn out?
It’s the sensation you feel when your soul is exhausted. Just like a sore body after running a marathon, your emotional self can run out of gas when you feel like you have nothing left to give.
Burn out almost snuffed out my sparkle two years ago. My volunteering had hit a fever pitch just as I was training to run three half marathons and had embarked on more demanding work duties. My body ached, my spirit was defeated. I felt dull and weak, with no fire inside to keep me going.
I began to shut down.
So I made drastic changes.
I withdrew from all of my volunteering endeavors. By the end of it, I’d actually become a horrible volunteer because I wasn’t committed. My sweet spot is life balance, and I found myself with a career and service obligations that both wanted a little bit more than what I could give.
Any good young professional keeps a hearty social calendar, too, and mine had been full of events – obligations with loose ties to philanthropy or politics. I love a good gala – the fun dresses, the cocktails. But the chit-chat can leave me feeling a bit empty. It may be a surprise to some, but I am a textbook introvert; I’d rather spend quality time with a solid group of 10 people or so and dig in to conversations that probe a bit. It’s hard to do that when you’re trapped in ballroom with 300 of your closest friends.
So I started weeding out the “have to” events and committed to the “want to” events.
Stoking the coals. That’s what I did. I needed to find my fire.
Outsiders might surmise it looked like I was pushing people away, but rather, I was retreating to take care of myself. I guess it goes back to that introvert thing: I crave a little bit of downtime so I can ignite my light and shine a little bit when I’m with others.
I made a few changes and it led to a healthy harmony in my life: good professional efforts, short civic stints that don’t burden and offer meaning, and social engagements that keep me connected to people and causes I adore.
But I still find myself wanting to do a wee bit more.
Enter the Five Minute Favor.
Adam Grant touched on this concept at last year’s Bold Fusion event. The thought is that we can each afford five to 15 minutes to help someone – whether that be by making a connection, advocating for a cause, or otherwise doing something that is helpful but not burdensome.
Right now my career doesn’t allow me to devote a lot of time to a given cause, but I can rock a 15 minute favor like it’s my job. I love connecting two people who would benefit from each other. I can easily spend five minutes crafting a meaningful thank-you note to someone who has made an impact on my life in some way. I can meet with someone for a drink to brainstorm their next great idea.
I wish I could save the world.
I wish I could nurture a thousand, meaningful relationships.
But for now, I know I can count on myself to deliver five to 15 minutes to help someone, and that 15 minutes could maybe, just maybe, mean the world to someone else.